My friend Leilani loves the haiku. In honor of her I've penned a few about this wretched, hot-ass weather we've been enduring.
The sun is boiling
The car seat burns my fat ass
My soul screams and melts
**
The sun bites my ass
Mother Nature is a bitch
I kick her ass...POW
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I drown in sunscreen
Freckles pop out all over
I'm pale as a corpse
**
Yum, watermelon
Get in my big mouth right now
Makes me pee pee lots
**
Custard from Rita's
Sun so hot it melts too fast
Oops drips on my boobs
Chick out...
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