Mind of a Mad Woman

You think I have an overactive imagination? A recent news story brought to mind a fantasy my friend Talullah once had. I like to say that she has the mind of a mad woman. Saying she's crazy is really just downright rude.

I'm sure you've heard the recent news about Mel Gibson* slapping around his girlfriend...the mother of his 47th child? Okay maybe he doens't have 47 children but he's got a shitload of spawn. I can only hope none of them turn out like him.

My how the mighty have fallen. It's hard to believe that the anti-semetic, abusive, whack job ever made the panties of so many females quiver. He did though. I don't know a single woman that didn't melt for him about a decade ago.

Talullah was crazy about him. I once asked if she could have anyone sing at her birthday and her answer was Mel Gibson. I just looked at her with a scowl and she said, "Well you didn't say it had to be a singer." *sigh* She had a point.

Back to her fantasy. She once fantasized that she was driving along and was pulled over. Who should walk up to her car? None other than Officer Mel Gibson!!

What do you think she did? I'm gonna give you three guesses...

Does your first guess Talullah unbuttoning her shirt and showing Officer Gibson her cleavage??? Well, you're wrong! As Talullah so elegantly put it one time...she's got nothing to cleave.

Does your second guess involve Talullah performing sexual acts on Officer Gibson???? Well, you're wrong!! I'm not sure why but that was not the first thing to come to her mind.

Does your third guess involve Talullah pulling a gun on Officer Gibson??? Ding! Ding! Ding!

We asked her what she did at that point and her answer was "nothing, that's it." What the fuck! She fantasizes about being pulled over by Mel Gibson and the big climax is her pulling a gun on him?? Mind of a man woman!! Mind of a mad woman!!!

I'm not sure which is more weird--her fantasy or the fact that she told her friends who would never forget and who would bring it up over and over again for years and probably include it in her eulogy when she finally passes over to whatever awaits her in the afterlife.

Knowing what we know now I guess maybe Talullah was a prophet. She knew a long time ago that the pig deserved to have a cap popped in his ass even if she secretly wanted to bite his ass instead.

Chick out...

*Note: The attached picture of Mel Gibson is from when he was still hot. He now looks like he's been bitched slapped by a jackhammer. I just couldn't bear to use a recent picture even if he is bat shit crazy.